sleep=panic

Last night I went to get C’s pump from him to change the cartridge and he realized it had been yanked out without his knowledge.  When? Who knows? How long without insulin? Was it out BEFORE he bolused for that cupcake earlier?  Ugh.  333 showed up on the meter.  Quick went through the change, tried to do a new insert and the inset didn’t stick on one side. I peeled it back slightly and saw that the canula was indeed inside his skin.  I have no idea why I didn’t start over at that point, but instead I pushed it the rest of the way in like a thumb tack and stuck the edges.  I immediately realized how stupid that was when he’s already high, but whatev…we all make weird decisions sometimes.  We had a no-carb dinner (eggs/bacon) due to that so I could make sure his number was coming down.  It stayed the same, so I corrected again.  Then I corrected again at bedtime.  With all this insulin on board I KNEW I had to recheck in an hour or so and set my alarm.  I also had an alarm at 2:30am for a final (hopefully) check.

This morning I woke up soooo comfy.  I must’ve slept really good because my bed was still made around me.  All of a sudden it hit me… Did I wake up for that night check???  Did I wake up at 2:30???  Did I seriously give my son 3 corrections for a high blood sugar, not know if his site was any good and then not even get up???  The feeling I got is the same feeling I get every single time I realize I didn’t wake up. It’s like needles through my body and nausea at the same time. It hits like a wave through my whole body and I’m scared of what I might find when I go to wake him up.

I found a beautiful sleeping child, nice and warm with a blood sugar of 73 and everything was good again.

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2 Responses

  1. Thank fully everything turned out ok! There’s been many nights before where I would head to bed with a less than perfect blood sugar and I don’t manage to wake back up to check it again until early morning … now being pregnany I try very hard to make sure I double check my sugars at night!!! I can’t possibly imagine how hard it is to manage it for a young child!

  2. This is by far the worst feeling in the world. THE WORST!

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