more venting and another positive Dr. apt.

Life, I’m seriously trying to make the best out of you.  Every day I DO feel closer to being content, but I think I’m still quite a way’s away.  For the most part, at home or with my kids, I’m feeling in control of our situation and feeling the same as always.  The problem seems to be when I can’t be with the kids, especially C.  When he’s at school or daycare and I have to be at work.  It think it’s just fear of not being in control if there’s a problem.  Daycare seems to be harder for me.  At school, the health tech sees what I do every day.  If I couldn’t be there, she’d pretty much know the routine.  At daycare, he just goes there and that’s it.  He rarely needs insulin when he’s there and he’s only there a few hours at a time.  When he’s low, he takes care of it.  I’m not sure they know what to do.  He’s got a glucagon kit there and I’ve explained it, but I’m not very clear about whether or not they’d no what to do if he needed it.  I’m also not sure that all of the counselors know about it.  Sometimes (holidays) there are other counselors there and I don’t even know if they know he’s got diabetes.  A few know that he’s got celiac, but I don’t think any know what it means other than he can’t have any food unless I send it with him.  It’s super hard to let go of the control and safety that I know I can provide and wish him a great day.  On top of that, I’m supposed to go to work and focus on  my job.  Even though it’s only now at 3 hours a day, it’s really difficult.  There aren’t a lot of people who understand this.  Well, I’m sure there are millions that do, but unfortunately they’re not my daycare provider or my boss.  If they were, maybe I could get rid of this headache.
Anyways, this morning we were back to the endo.  She decided not to change anything right now being that we MIGHT be getting the pump next week.  She likes his numbers at this point.  Hallelujah.  They also gave the boys skateboards for Christmas.  So sweet.  They really are such a great office.  I asked if they had the H1N1 flumist in again for E and they had a very limited supply.  Since he was with us they just went ahead and gave it to him while were there.  I’ve never been happy with our doctors’ offices.  It’s such a nice change!  I always feel so much better after our visit to the Dr.

daycare and lows and tempting gluten

There’s no school today being that tomorrow’s Thanksgiving.  BUT, I did have to work this afternoon.  Only for about an hour and a half.  Twice a week the boys go to afterschool care on campus.  On holidays, kids from 3 schools all come there along with the counselors that work at those schools.  We got there, signed in, looked around and realized they were all counselors from other schools.  I asked where our normal ones were.  “They were only here until noon today.”  Crap.  That means I’m already later for work and now I’m leaving my kids with people who don’t even know C has diabetes, don’t know the “rules” of how to take care of that situation, don’t know where they keep his box of extra carbs/meter/etc, and don’t know what “glucagon kit” means…
It was super scary leaving him, but figured it wouldn’t be very long and he plays in the neighborhood with his friends all the time with no adults.  He can handle a situation and get a hold of me when there’s a problem.
When I picked him up they told me he went low and told them he couldn’t even test he was so low.  He took his carbs and waited 15 minutes.  At that point he was 90.  The counselor had him wait another 5 minutes and test again to be sure it was still going up.  At least I like her just-in-case thought process…
So, after that, they had to sit down while they got snack ready.  I got there as the last people were being called to get theirs.  C walked over to me and the other lady yelled to him not to forget his SMORES….  BUMMER!!  Poor kid got to sit and watch 50 other kids eating their smores.  We had to wait for E to finish his.  C went outside and I asked if he was alright.  He just didn’t want to see them eat anymore because it was hard for him to not get any.  I said that we could look for GF graham crackers and he cut me off.  “I don’t need them, they just looked good.”
Rough day.  I guess it prepares you for a rough life though?